Friday, March 17, 2006
Mill-a-Mall-a-Maal
This topic may sound boring to many of you, but I have been thinking about it since yesterday night after watching a TV show on it.
Long ago:
One upon a time Mumbai was considered a hub for textile mills in India followed by Surat and other places. That time people who owned the mills made a fortune out of it, but as we know life revolves around a circle, so is any business. The time came when the textile mill business doomed here in Mumbai due to reasons unknown to me. That left 30,000 people unemployed. I like to believe that there after some disappointed souls went back to their native places and have started farming, some smart asses have joined political parties and some are taxis and auto rickshaws driver now. It’s really sad to hear stories of some really poor families who are still suffering from financial crises because the person working with mill could not find another job.
It is said that out of those 30,000 people, 16,000 have been paid their remuneration, leaving 14,000 people begging for their money till date. The mill owners are ready to pay money to the remaining lot, but for that they will have to shell out close to Rs. 200 crore (2 billion!!!) from their pocket, and they claim that due to heavy losses they had suffered during declination period, they are left with very little money to do justice to 14,000 not so lucky people.
During those days, every mill used to have their own union, whose job was to fight for mill workers rights (and take their cut while settling down certain issues with the mill management). Every union consisted of some 10 – 15 good and smart bargainers, headed by a person who proved himself to be the smartest of the lot.
Not so long ago:
Anyways, getting back to the story, after a few harsh decisions taken by whom so ever to shut down mill operations, textile mills land was of no use for several years.
One day one smart ass (read: owner of former Phoenix mills, and now High Street Phoenix), gets up and says I want to build malls and multiplexes and what not to make this a “happening place”. I don’t know how he did that, but if you see, right now it is the most buzzing place across Mumbai. As of now, you have 3 huge malls, 1 super market, good knows how many restaurants, quite a few multinational corporate offices, couple of places show casing cutting edge furniture ….. the list is long. Now they are building a tower on the parking lot, which itself was as big as one foot ball field. Now in the tower they gona have first 3 levels for parking, 4th and 5th , shops for branded products and from 6th onwards a 5 star hotel!!!
Looking at this success, now every mill owner wants to follow the trend. From what I hear, there are places building 22 new 5 star hotels and god knows how many malls!
Fair enough, anyways we Indians are more of followers and less of leaders. (I hate to say this…)
Now:
After god knows how many months, finally the Supreme Court has given a go ahead to mill owners to trade off their own land. Now the problem is, we have a group of people who were against this decision saying, “We, Mumbai-ites need open space in the city, so all these mills should give away a part of their land to the government to build parks. Or they should do it themselves for the betterment of the city.” (Apart from paying those 14,000 poor people). They also suggested building housing colonies for poor and middle class people on the empty land (poor – middle class does not include 14,000).
If you think from your heart, this sounds absolutely perfect. But on second thoughts, you realize that these suggestions are absolutely ridiculous. For example if I buy a car, and tomorrow someone comes up and says, “You have a car, so you not only give me ride every day, but also pay me X amount for giving you company.”
Nonsense isn’t it? I worked hard, my family supported me all the way, I don’t even know you and you want to make a fool of me!
Anti-mill space trading people say that;
1.) Mumbai needs open space
2.) Mumbai needs wider roads
3.) Mumbai needs gardens
4.) …
I say, yes, Mumbai needs open space, wider roads, gardens, parks etc etc… But that by no way means mill owners should give away 60% of their land in charity. Here is a calculation,
Free mall land area: approx. 400 acres,
Rate per acre: approx. Rs. 300 Crore (3 billion))
Total: 400 * 30,000,000,000 = m bad at math
60% of “m bad at math” goes in charity much before the 40% that will go to mill owners!!! Am sure that not fair to the mill owners.
Firstly if these mill owners do not give away anything to the society, and make money in god knows what unit, eventually they will have to do charity to save on tax if not for the sake of humanity. (Like everyone does, from Bill gates to tata to Birla to Ambani).
On the other hand, assume 60% of the land is donated to build residential building for poor and middle class people. Will they be able to afford the monthly maintenance? Today in Mumbai, minimum monthly maintenance per Sq. Ft. is Rs. 1 – Rs. 1.5. Assume the poor have been given free flat, and middle class at low cost, but the question is will they be able to maintain their houses shelling out minimum of 500 – 600 rupees a month?
Damn.. third page of this post. Anyways, what am saying is, am not taking the mill owners side, am not against anti-mill land trading group, I do sympathize with the poor .But for god sake; poor people are poor, not crippled. Please do not make it a habit for them to be a pile on all their life. Please don’t try and be their bosses, give them their own space to make it big in their life. Show them a way, don’t show them the destination. I am not saying mill owners should build only malls, 5 star – 7 star hotels or multiplexes. I am not sure if its tuff or not tuff, but if Dhiru bhai Ambani can do it, if Owner of Bharti Group, Mr. Mittal can do it, why can’t others. Agreed to a certain extend it’s a game of luck, but at least give them an opportunity to give it a shot!
But on the second thought, for poor people or even for that matter for people like me, starting from scratch especially when your age is not on your side is extremely difficult.
Don’t know … it’s just a thought that has been playing in my mind…..
Long ago:
One upon a time Mumbai was considered a hub for textile mills in India followed by Surat and other places. That time people who owned the mills made a fortune out of it, but as we know life revolves around a circle, so is any business. The time came when the textile mill business doomed here in Mumbai due to reasons unknown to me. That left 30,000 people unemployed. I like to believe that there after some disappointed souls went back to their native places and have started farming, some smart asses have joined political parties and some are taxis and auto rickshaws driver now. It’s really sad to hear stories of some really poor families who are still suffering from financial crises because the person working with mill could not find another job.
It is said that out of those 30,000 people, 16,000 have been paid their remuneration, leaving 14,000 people begging for their money till date. The mill owners are ready to pay money to the remaining lot, but for that they will have to shell out close to Rs. 200 crore (2 billion!!!) from their pocket, and they claim that due to heavy losses they had suffered during declination period, they are left with very little money to do justice to 14,000 not so lucky people.
During those days, every mill used to have their own union, whose job was to fight for mill workers rights (and take their cut while settling down certain issues with the mill management). Every union consisted of some 10 – 15 good and smart bargainers, headed by a person who proved himself to be the smartest of the lot.
Not so long ago:
Anyways, getting back to the story, after a few harsh decisions taken by whom so ever to shut down mill operations, textile mills land was of no use for several years.
One day one smart ass (read: owner of former Phoenix mills, and now High Street Phoenix), gets up and says I want to build malls and multiplexes and what not to make this a “happening place”. I don’t know how he did that, but if you see, right now it is the most buzzing place across Mumbai. As of now, you have 3 huge malls, 1 super market, good knows how many restaurants, quite a few multinational corporate offices, couple of places show casing cutting edge furniture ….. the list is long. Now they are building a tower on the parking lot, which itself was as big as one foot ball field. Now in the tower they gona have first 3 levels for parking, 4th and 5th , shops for branded products and from 6th onwards a 5 star hotel!!!
Looking at this success, now every mill owner wants to follow the trend. From what I hear, there are places building 22 new 5 star hotels and god knows how many malls!
Fair enough, anyways we Indians are more of followers and less of leaders. (I hate to say this…)
Now:
After god knows how many months, finally the Supreme Court has given a go ahead to mill owners to trade off their own land. Now the problem is, we have a group of people who were against this decision saying, “We, Mumbai-ites need open space in the city, so all these mills should give away a part of their land to the government to build parks. Or they should do it themselves for the betterment of the city.” (Apart from paying those 14,000 poor people). They also suggested building housing colonies for poor and middle class people on the empty land (poor – middle class does not include 14,000).
If you think from your heart, this sounds absolutely perfect. But on second thoughts, you realize that these suggestions are absolutely ridiculous. For example if I buy a car, and tomorrow someone comes up and says, “You have a car, so you not only give me ride every day, but also pay me X amount for giving you company.”
Nonsense isn’t it? I worked hard, my family supported me all the way, I don’t even know you and you want to make a fool of me!
Anti-mill space trading people say that;
1.) Mumbai needs open space
2.) Mumbai needs wider roads
3.) Mumbai needs gardens
4.) …
I say, yes, Mumbai needs open space, wider roads, gardens, parks etc etc… But that by no way means mill owners should give away 60% of their land in charity. Here is a calculation,
Free mall land area: approx. 400 acres,
Rate per acre: approx. Rs. 300 Crore (3 billion))
Total: 400 * 30,000,000,000 = m bad at math
60% of “m bad at math” goes in charity much before the 40% that will go to mill owners!!! Am sure that not fair to the mill owners.
Firstly if these mill owners do not give away anything to the society, and make money in god knows what unit, eventually they will have to do charity to save on tax if not for the sake of humanity. (Like everyone does, from Bill gates to tata to Birla to Ambani).
On the other hand, assume 60% of the land is donated to build residential building for poor and middle class people. Will they be able to afford the monthly maintenance? Today in Mumbai, minimum monthly maintenance per Sq. Ft. is Rs. 1 – Rs. 1.5. Assume the poor have been given free flat, and middle class at low cost, but the question is will they be able to maintain their houses shelling out minimum of 500 – 600 rupees a month?
Damn.. third page of this post. Anyways, what am saying is, am not taking the mill owners side, am not against anti-mill land trading group, I do sympathize with the poor .But for god sake; poor people are poor, not crippled. Please do not make it a habit for them to be a pile on all their life. Please don’t try and be their bosses, give them their own space to make it big in their life. Show them a way, don’t show them the destination. I am not saying mill owners should build only malls, 5 star – 7 star hotels or multiplexes. I am not sure if its tuff or not tuff, but if Dhiru bhai Ambani can do it, if Owner of Bharti Group, Mr. Mittal can do it, why can’t others. Agreed to a certain extend it’s a game of luck, but at least give them an opportunity to give it a shot!
But on the second thought, for poor people or even for that matter for people like me, starting from scratch especially when your age is not on your side is extremely difficult.
Don’t know … it’s just a thought that has been playing in my mind…..
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
F.I.M.E. Awards
When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So, what the hell, leap!?
Hello and welcome to the FIME Awards. Oh oh don’t go away these are no way close to the millions of awards going on everywhere. They are awards that have people from everyday life. Interesting isn’t it. Just read on
FIME awards (read Foot In Mouth Excellence) honors individuals who have contributed generously to the field of being foolish. You find all kinds who consist of this great universe. I have short listed a couple of people who I feel fit the bill to the T. Theirs are instances that show their love for being foolish and overtime has become second nature to them .
Let’s have a look
First Finalist: Mr. CEO
The story begins with a party scene. Where CEO of a very well known technology company hears a word called Web 2.0. (Web 2.0 is supposed to be a natural progression of the architecture and application development for the internet). Unfortunately, Mr. CEO just hears the word Web 2.0, and has no idea what is it all about.
Next day morning he calls the Tech head of the company inside his cabin.
CEO: Listen Tech head, I want the progress report for the on going project.
Tech Head: Yes sir, it’s READY and I will send it to you by TOMORROW MORNING.
CEO: If it’s ready why will you mail me the report tomorrow morning!!!
CEO: Anyways, I’ve called you to figure out from where can we get Web 2.0?
Tech Head: Huhh!!! Buy web 2.0???
Now that’s what I call a perfect way of making fool of you. ;)
Second Finalist: Restaurant Owner
A very well known restaurant in Mumbai wants to advertise so they call in a media planning agency to design a media plan for them. The Business development manager (BDM) of the agency meets up with the owner at a pre-fixed time.
BDM: Hello Mr. Owner
Owner: Hello!! Hello!! I have heard of your company a lot, that’s why I decided to do all my advertising work with your company.
BDM: Yes Sir, that’s so smart of you.
BDM: So Mr. Owner how have you been marketing for your restaurant till now?
Owner: Arre marketing is never an issue. Every morning I go to the fish market with my wife and buy different types of fishes ourselves.
BDM: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (W.T.F!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Am sure you would have nominees to add to the list. Go ahead add the growing list of foolish population and let’s see who takes the cake.
Cheers.
Hello and welcome to the FIME Awards. Oh oh don’t go away these are no way close to the millions of awards going on everywhere. They are awards that have people from everyday life. Interesting isn’t it. Just read on
FIME awards (read Foot In Mouth Excellence) honors individuals who have contributed generously to the field of being foolish. You find all kinds who consist of this great universe. I have short listed a couple of people who I feel fit the bill to the T. Theirs are instances that show their love for being foolish and overtime has become second nature to them .
Let’s have a look
First Finalist: Mr. CEO
The story begins with a party scene. Where CEO of a very well known technology company hears a word called Web 2.0. (Web 2.0 is supposed to be a natural progression of the architecture and application development for the internet). Unfortunately, Mr. CEO just hears the word Web 2.0, and has no idea what is it all about.
Next day morning he calls the Tech head of the company inside his cabin.
CEO: Listen Tech head, I want the progress report for the on going project.
Tech Head: Yes sir, it’s READY and I will send it to you by TOMORROW MORNING.
CEO: If it’s ready why will you mail me the report tomorrow morning!!!
CEO: Anyways, I’ve called you to figure out from where can we get Web 2.0?
Tech Head: Huhh!!! Buy web 2.0???
Now that’s what I call a perfect way of making fool of you. ;)
Second Finalist: Restaurant Owner
A very well known restaurant in Mumbai wants to advertise so they call in a media planning agency to design a media plan for them. The Business development manager (BDM) of the agency meets up with the owner at a pre-fixed time.
BDM: Hello Mr. Owner
Owner: Hello!! Hello!! I have heard of your company a lot, that’s why I decided to do all my advertising work with your company.
BDM: Yes Sir, that’s so smart of you.
BDM: So Mr. Owner how have you been marketing for your restaurant till now?
Owner: Arre marketing is never an issue. Every morning I go to the fish market with my wife and buy different types of fishes ourselves.
BDM: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (W.T.F!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Am sure you would have nominees to add to the list. Go ahead add the growing list of foolish population and let’s see who takes the cake.
Cheers.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
Take see number. 9211
Yesterday I saw this movie called Taxi No. 9211, staring Nana Patekar, John Abraham, Samira Reddy. Trust me this movie has specially thanked so many people leaving an impression that it was made for free. It also provoked me to write a song on an incident that happened with me back during my school time.
As usual I could not come up with an original tune so I had to get inspirited by “The man who sold the world – Nirvana”.
Before I actually start the song, this name Nirvana sounds so funny to me. I mean imagine if you have form a band here in India on the lines of Nirvana, what would you call it? I don’t know about you fine people but in my mind I can think of only one name, “Do you want water” No please don’t come up with so many questions at the same time. Let me explain you the logic behind it.
1.) The original name reads as NIRVANA.
2.) Break that name in to 2 parts, so now you have NIR and VANA
3.) NIR (its actually Neer, but to justify the logic I am contemplating it as Nir) in tamil means Water
4.) Vana AKA WANA
5.) So now you have Neer Wana
6.) Neer Wana = Do you want water
Phew, ok I know. Sorry. But see it’s logically correct, isn’t it!
That was a PJ, and as they say one action leads to another. So let me ask you a question, what is the opposite of Metallica?
Think hard people …
Think think …
No, I wont make it look like one of those forward forward mails also after hearing Nirvana logic no one must be in a mood to think … so here’s the answer.
Opposite of Metallica is Mebaalwalika.
Metallica = Mein tali ka = I belong to a baldie
Opposite of I belong to a baldie is I belong to a hairy freak = mein baal wali ka = mebaalwalika
Thus, opposite of Metallica is Mebaalwalika is proved. ;)
So now coming back to the song. Actually you know the songs from this movie are quite time pass, not THAT bad. Two of them are pretty melodious. Trust me when I say that guys, I have learnt Tabla and Key board so I have decent taste in music ;).
Damn! What am I talking? Where am I going? We are talking about the movie. You know the biggest conspiracy behind the US – 9/11 tragedies! Yesterday after the movie I realized that who so ever was the master mind behind it actually got inspirited from this age of Indian proverb “Chal, nau do Gyarah ho jate hai” (Let’s fuck off from here). But that’s not important, the important things here are these numbers, 9 2 1 1. Trust me; the whole thinking must have begun from here. 2 air crafts, on 9/11. Haan, yes see now you get the idea.
Ok enough of nonsense, coming back to the point. The movie is quite ok. I liked John Abraham’s suit. And Samira Reddy as usual looks fairly hot. Another thing that I noticed is one of our fellow blogger distinctly resembles Samira Reddy. I don’t know if I can take the liberty of posting the fellow blogger’s name here. But all in the name of true sportman spirit, I think there are quite a few similarities between Madame Mahima and Samira Reddy. Especially the jaw line…
So in the movie you have John staring opposite Samira. And the missing character in the movie was Circuit from Munna bhai MBBS, Arshad Warsi :D. How I wish if the director of the movie could have taken Arshad instead of John!
Regardless of my random crap, I seriously have a song, but I see now this article is so long that I have decided to post the song in my next post.
Till en … keep building nonsense logic and have fun.
Cheers.
As usual I could not come up with an original tune so I had to get inspirited by “The man who sold the world – Nirvana”.
Before I actually start the song, this name Nirvana sounds so funny to me. I mean imagine if you have form a band here in India on the lines of Nirvana, what would you call it? I don’t know about you fine people but in my mind I can think of only one name, “Do you want water” No please don’t come up with so many questions at the same time. Let me explain you the logic behind it.
1.) The original name reads as NIRVANA.
2.) Break that name in to 2 parts, so now you have NIR and VANA
3.) NIR (its actually Neer, but to justify the logic I am contemplating it as Nir) in tamil means Water
4.) Vana AKA WANA
5.) So now you have Neer Wana
6.) Neer Wana = Do you want water
Phew, ok I know. Sorry. But see it’s logically correct, isn’t it!
That was a PJ, and as they say one action leads to another. So let me ask you a question, what is the opposite of Metallica?
Think hard people …
Think think …
No, I wont make it look like one of those forward forward mails also after hearing Nirvana logic no one must be in a mood to think … so here’s the answer.
Opposite of Metallica is Mebaalwalika.
Metallica = Mein tali ka = I belong to a baldie
Opposite of I belong to a baldie is I belong to a hairy freak = mein baal wali ka = mebaalwalika
Thus, opposite of Metallica is Mebaalwalika is proved. ;)
So now coming back to the song. Actually you know the songs from this movie are quite time pass, not THAT bad. Two of them are pretty melodious. Trust me when I say that guys, I have learnt Tabla and Key board so I have decent taste in music ;).
Damn! What am I talking? Where am I going? We are talking about the movie. You know the biggest conspiracy behind the US – 9/11 tragedies! Yesterday after the movie I realized that who so ever was the master mind behind it actually got inspirited from this age of Indian proverb “Chal, nau do Gyarah ho jate hai” (Let’s fuck off from here). But that’s not important, the important things here are these numbers, 9 2 1 1. Trust me; the whole thinking must have begun from here. 2 air crafts, on 9/11. Haan, yes see now you get the idea.
Ok enough of nonsense, coming back to the point. The movie is quite ok. I liked John Abraham’s suit. And Samira Reddy as usual looks fairly hot. Another thing that I noticed is one of our fellow blogger distinctly resembles Samira Reddy. I don’t know if I can take the liberty of posting the fellow blogger’s name here. But all in the name of true sportman spirit, I think there are quite a few similarities between Madame Mahima and Samira Reddy. Especially the jaw line…
So in the movie you have John staring opposite Samira. And the missing character in the movie was Circuit from Munna bhai MBBS, Arshad Warsi :D. How I wish if the director of the movie could have taken Arshad instead of John!
Regardless of my random crap, I seriously have a song, but I see now this article is so long that I have decided to post the song in my next post.
Till en … keep building nonsense logic and have fun.
Cheers.
